Missing Tommy

It isn't supposed to be so hard to let your children go, is it?

We are all missing Tommy so much this week. Last week, it was easier somehow. Maybe it felt like he was just away on a short trip and would be back soon. I don't know. But the last couple of days the reality has hit all of us.

His place at the table will be empty until Christmas break.

You would think we would be used to this, since Tommy already spent part of last year back in the States. Maybe it's harder because we can't all go with him to get him settled and see him in his dorm room and look around the campus with him. Thankfully, John will get to go, and he promises to bring back pictures. A hopeful and comforting promise, for which I am grateful.

Tonight Matthew prayed, "God bless Daddy and Mommy and Patrick and Tommy far away and bring him to heaven and home safely to see me because I miss him so much."

And Mommy's voice breaks during the Angel of God. "Please watch over him, take care of him, keep him close to you," I pray in my head before I kiss and cuddle little ones goodnight. Not so very long ago, he was the little golden-haired boy in this top bunk. Not so long ago, he was studying at our school table. Not so long ago, he was the high schooler who was excited about taking a class at school.

Always, I know they are all God's children lent to us for a short while to love and nurture, to teach and discipline, to prepare them to live for God in the world. Today, this short while just seems too short.